ALS Update

September 8, 2010 at 8:02 6 comments

Today we go Hershey Medical Center to get my Botox injections to control my drooling.  It’s a not precise procedure too much will leave my mouth dry and too little I will keep drooling.  After we are going to look at new computers to replace the one I dropped last week.

I remember when James Montgomery Boice had brain cancer the last time he talk with his congregation he said, “Remember, God gave me this cancer….”

God determines when we die and what we die from. I was diagnosed with ALS two years ago by a doctor at Johns Hopkins Medical Center in east Baltimore, Maryland. I have the most aggressive form of ALS the mortality rate is 3 to 5 years. I can no longer speak, I trip a lot, drop things often, and have fallen numerous times. Muscle cramps that hurt and I try to stretch them but sometimes stretching does no good. My arms are becoming weaker

and my grip is no longer as strong as it was. My ability to swallow is becoming more problematic today I a choking episode that wife deeply concerned about as well as my children. They put feeding tube into my stomach eight months ago and it coming close to where I will be getting all my nutrition through that tube.

My wife and children grieve for me every day. My youngest children 16 and almost 14 are trying putting my death into their theological perspectives.

God gave me this disease for his glory as live out my life with this disease. Everything on my laptop is my life. My music, social networking, blogging for God, and a text to speech program which allows me to speak. Last weekend I drop my computer and destroyed it. Tomorrow I get Botox injections into my saliva glands to stop my drooling after word we are going to the Apple store and check their computers. I am virus magnet and Apple computer does not get viruses. Next Wednesday I will be have my clinic visit that last four hours at Hershey Medical Center in Hershey, Pennsylvania.

I asked our Father to extend my life until I walk all my daughters down the aisle and attend my son’s wedding. I asked for 15 years and then kill me a massive heart attack in the month May. That’s how Trasks in my family die.

Pray to our Father for me to give 13 more years of life so I will have to orphan my children and raise them into adulthood. But if my Father wants me sooner he is still the best father I ever had. Also pray for my wife and my children that when I die they will go toward God with their pain and not run from Him.

Despite my disease God is good and merciful. He filled my life with love, joy, contentment, peace over dozen years ago and has given me the fruits of Spirit. I cannot complain about anything in my life because my Father redeemed me when I was sinner and a rebel. He should have slain me but instead the loved me. Praise Him!! Praise Him!!! Praise Him!!!! Praise Him!!!!! Praise Him!!!!!!
Praise Him!!!!!!!

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Boasting Job

6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Carol  |  September 8, 2010 at 8:02

    Praying for you, Paul. Hope you can recover what you want on your old computer. The Lord can do awesome things. You are giving your family a glimpse of heaven.

    Yesterday a professional told me that my husband based on his brain MRI that showed two forms of dementia should not be dressing himself–but he still does. We caregivers are there for our husbands and this life is not all. One day our souls and bodies will be put back together and we will see Jesus.

    Reply
  • 2. missy emig  |  September 8, 2010 at 8:02

    Hi Paul,

    You do not know me, but I attend Jesus Messiah Evangelical Free church in Hanvover. Your daughter is one of my facebook friends and I must admit that I don’t really know her either, but we are sisters in Christ. I know of your condition through the church bulletin. If you know Ralph Emig, I am his daughter in law. Anyhow, I just read your post and am so inspired by you!! Your faith and love for the Lord is so inspiring especially given your circumstances. I truly believe that you are being an example to your family and they would absolutley turn to God for their comfort. I don’t think they would blame God when you don’t. I pray that I would have your kind of unwavering faith! God Bless you, and know that even now through this post God is using you for His Glory!!!

    Reply
  • 3. Jodie Mc  |  September 9, 2010 at 8:02

    hey Paul,
    yesterday I was feeling pretty discouraged that I seem to continually feel like sh** inside because of depression. In desperation I opened Ed Welsh’s book and read this…
    “After Jesus perspectives on suffering become even more radical. Now suffering is viewed as the pains of childbirth rather than a random, meaningless event. Since Jesus came, suffering is redemptive. It is part of the pilgrim’s path and it is a good one.”
    “Suffering is a teacher. It taught Jesus and it can teach us. But it only truly teaches us as we fix our eyes on Jesus. If you avoid Him in the midst of pain, expect to be embittered by it. But if you look to Jesus, you will no longer be alone. You will be strengthened and you will be changed. Expect to say, ‘this is exactly what I needed. Through depression (or whatever suffering is present) I have learned things about God and myself. It would have been nothing short of a tragedy not to have learned them’.”
    Thanks for living out these wise truths, Paul. Your suffering is so so difficult. We can’t imagine what you go through on a daily basis. But you are walking the good pilgrim’s path, holding out Jesus to us along the way, as best you can with the cup you’ve been given. I honor you for that. Go get your Apple computer and enjoy it!!!!

    Reply
    • 4. traskman  |  September 10, 2010 at 8:02

      Jodie,

      You are counted among the mighty of God.

      C. H. Sturgeon would be bed ridden because of his depression he would being in the pulpit for weeks. He would quote scripture at Satan and to calm his mind down. He had a photographic memory. He remembered everything he ever read or saw. That can be a blessing and a curse. Forgetting somethings is good sometimes.

      Under God’s Grace,

      Paul

      Reply
  • 5. Keera Scruggs  |  September 9, 2010 at 8:02

    Mr. Paul,
    I don’t know if you remember me much but my mom, Jeri Scruggs, and Mrs. Debbie were high school friends. I keep in touch with Abby through Facebook and Erin as well. I’m not generally much of a spiritual person (I have my own connection to God where I don’t ask him for much and he respects the same way) but I’m praying for you and your family. I try and say little things to Abby every now and again to make her smile for a moment or cheer her up for a short while. I’m praying that you are able to meet your first grandchild. I pray that you suffer no pain and that He doesn’t give you a bigger burden than you are able to handle. Most of all, I pray for a miracle. I know we’re not supposed to ask Him for things because He knows best but I ask all the same. You have a plethora of people who love you and are praying for you. I know He has a plan but I hope he takes all these prayers into consideration. Take care and God bless.

    Reply

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